Today is my birthday, and all I can say is I’m so thankful for life!! For my life!! I was up so late last night and it was so hard to sleep, I was just so filled with thankfulness for the gift of being alive!! For being one of the chosen to have life, all the blessings and hard times, so thankful for it all!!
I wanted to share some things I’ve experienced, learned & what’s to come!
23 was one of the hardest years of my life, I experienced the loss of my grandpa shortly before my birthday last year, who I was so close with and I had a miscarriage at the very beginning of this January.. I have a post regarding our experience with miscarriage, I just don’t have the courage to share all those details quite yet. I experienced so many mindset shifts, my eyes have been opened yet a again and 23 had been a year of my life where I pushed and pushed myself to the limit, followed by disappointment, frustration and loss. 23 was a rollercoaster, and it seems like there were a lot of “big things” that were bad, but there were good things as well- using grieving times to get closer to my husband, learning to love my husband better, developing new relationships, growing closer in my relationship with God, mending broken relationships in my family, experiencing joy in the every day, revamping my blog, finding myself on a deeper level and we bought our first home!
My husband had a picture made for me, that combined a recent picture of me, with one of the first pictures of me that I took with my husband. It brings me to tears looking at that picture specifically and pictures of me today vs how I was a year ago, 2,3,4,5,10 years ago.. the woman I see today is confident in who she is, she knows she brings value, has proven to herself that she can overcome anything with Christ, she’s willing to take risks, she know’s who she is and is decisive with her decisions, she’s disciplined and is proud of who she’s become and becoming. I wasn’t always that way.. I used to have such a low self image, felt like my voice didn’t matter, just a wallflower & the girl that was nice & a kind friend, I thought I knew what I wanted but now I know Who I want to be and become, and that’s changed everything for me the last few years.
Trials and tribulations may “suck” in the moment, but within the darkness there’s always light to be found and I can tell you, when I had my miscarriage, I’ve never felt (and still feel) so vulnerable, raw and cut open, in my life. Through it all, I know who my maker is and He uses everything for good & I choose to be thankful for it and choose joy over bitterness or hate. Life happens, life happens to everyone but what really matters is who/what we turn to during those times and how we respond.
This year I’ve experienced lightyears of growth and I’ll never be the same, forever changed. I’m extremely grateful for year 23 and the years that came before.
I’m excited for what’s to come and who I become in the process, here’s to 24!!
Thank you for being on this journey with me, I appreciate all of you!!
If you ever have questions or want to talk, I’m always here sis!